Why now?

When asked the question, "why bring this up now", the answer is either
A) it is now relevant
B) there was not the time, place, or space to talk about it
C) you never asked
D) because I'm sick of not talking about it
E) I'm ready to give up who I am for who I can be.

Drawn lines

Where is the line between pressing and depressing?

Menopause

The heater at a yoga studio where I work is menopausal. It puts outs hot flashes followed by periods of cold,

Nap

A nap is a supine intervention. So is yoga nidra.

Cost

Which costs more-- paying your bills or paying attention?

Who are you?

Who are we really? Are we willing to see that which we have suspected is true in spite if what some of those around us have tried to convince us is untrue?

It's 5 o'clock

Somewhere...

Falling

All things being equal - a grain of sand falls just as hard as a grand piano.

Sunday

Do what inspires you. If nothing inspires you, change a habit. That habit is probably what is keeping you from inspiration. It may not seem like it, but holding on to a habit is more work than we realize. Changing a habit creates space for something new.

Shake it up

I like having my kitchen all torn up right now. It's like the work we do in yoga. We churn things around, shine a light on those hidden dark spaces, clean them out, and end up with a brand new kitchen!

What is really liberating about having the house cut up into little weird habitable zones, is that all my previous patterning is broken up. I'm forced to do something different and as a result, i'm different. I am seizing this opportunity to explore other ways of occupying space - whether it be physical, esoteric, external or internal.

In a sense, it's like fasting. Changing the routine to create space and awareness for something new to occur.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

and today was a very blueberry day.

Sun and Moon Projections

SUN CONSUMING THE MOON

aspects of svadistha/water element  (second chakra) – it has 2 moons: internal and external

            Internal – unconscious

            External – conscious

The water element represents our earthly instincts: sleep, sex, sustance, survival

We are mostly water, as is our planet, after all! Think about what affects the tides. You are a mini-earth and those same tides occur on your planet. So – see the planet, you get to see who you are.

God created us to see what it is. We are the projection of God. We are what God looks like. Of course, we can only see what we can understand, but there are micro-macrocosms everywhere to help us out with that understanding. As we build the sun to consume the moon – when the sun is below the moon, it dries those attachments we are no longer at the mercy of the gravitational pull of the physical plane. The laws of the physical plane cease to have impact. 

Yesterday's blog

Yesterday
All my blogging seems so far away
I thought my blog was here to stay
Cuz I forgot to publish yesterday's

Here it is:

When given the a cup of warm nuts, which do you eat first?
A) almonds
B) pecans
C) cashews
D) pistachio
E) none of the above

Remodeling the Kitchen

We left for vacation the day they started. Walls being cut, plumbing being plumbed. What would greet us when we arrived a week later?

Holes were cut, plumbing was plumbed, wiring revealed, and habitual pathways destroyed. What used to be a quick run up and down the stairs is no longer quick. Weird plastic sheets hang from the ceilings, taped to the walls. I pass through these area dividers with a similar caution one might have moving through beaded curtains. Like a gypsy I explore the new, less than efficient layout for living possibilities, given there are bare walls where the kitchen used to be.

Since the house is split into 3 half-ish levels, and because we moved the frig into the garage, the laundry room seemed like the best place to set up camp.

There is something creepy, yet oddly poetic about doing the food prep and cleanup in the bathroom.

The cycle of life continues, and for the next few weeks, I will be reminded of that almost continually. I wonder what odd inspirations will come from that reminder.

Conditioning

The air in the airport must be in excellent shape cuz it feels quite conditioned on here. Brrrr

Vairagya

Letting go of something before the pain of not letting it go becomes greater than that which is to be let go - that is the "higher" form of vairagya. It's when we let go of something from a place of knowing. That place where in your heart of hearts it is the best thing for you. This is not the same as "I should let this go because it's bad for me." It is letting go from an inner knowing and desire, not from a social thought construct or group belief.

For me, this is more difficult than letting go of something when you've "had enough" of it. It's that letting go before your physical, mental, or emotional threshold is reached.

This aspect of vairagya is a speedier approach, but can only go into effect when the level of consciousness is able to discern the difference between inner knowing and outer constructs.

To do

Traveling- I brought things to do. But I am enjoying doing nothing instead.

Warp

What is "warp speed?" If it refers to time, isn't that always happening, depending on where you are and what you're doing?

Sometimes

Sometimes words get in the way. I know that's in a song somewhere. Sometimes songs get in my head. And songs are full of words getting in the way. Sometimes.

sap

my dog stepped in tree sap today. within minutes, the glob of stickiness between his paws that glued his front toenails together, spread into globs around his collar, other legs, face, and other places i don't feel comfortable mentioning. It just goes to show how a moment of unconsciousness can go viral in the blink of an eye. This is not to invoke the god of Fear, but to show how easily we can get off of our path, distracted by the goo that we step in, when the goo becomes our Universe and the sole focus of our attention.

why can't we do that with the opposite of goo?

Another point for crisis management. Not that we're keeping score.

For me, I'm just trying to even the playing field so I can make a conscious choice. Where I can ask myself "to goo or not to goo."

Cravings

Crave crisis? Dig drama? We ask ourselves, why? isn't it because the deeper doodoo that we are in, the more we push our selves to that point of surrender. The worse it is,  the easier it is for us to let go of whatever aspect of our self, our attachments, our tendencies that got us to that point of perceiving crisis.

Perhaps it's not the crisis we crave or the drama we dig. Perhaps it's the feeling of letting go - the rush of freedom that we experience in the dropping of all the B.S.

So the question is, if it's the letting go, the surrender of old samskaras (impressions from the past that play out in our future) that makes us feel good, why not start there? This practice can start on the yoga mat or at the grocery store. Take a breath and choose to act differently - see what happens. If you like the result, if you feel the freedom of letting go, then you just saved yourself a big freakout moment in the future.

Timing

Timing... she is a weird-a-beast.

Get your Sri on

Not many of us like to watch struggle, unless it's a movie, but even then, we are counting on the right 2 people living happily ever after, the meek inherit the earth, good prevails over evil, the long-shot has his day.

So why do we continue to put on the facade of working so hard, when most of us know that we've had it figured out for a long time, but in order to fit in, we dumb ourselves down, play the work ethic/struggle/complain gang, just to fit it and not draw attention to ourselves. Well, it's time to stop worrying about that and let the attention go where it will. It's time to light the light of a new paradigm - life isn't hard, it's glorious, resplendent, Sri (shree).

Can we let go of our attachment to pleasing others in order to be the person that has the guts to speak your truth?  Do we have the courage to be the person that is having a good day, who enjoys life and isn't afraid to own it?  It's funny how this person starts to attract more and more of what they deem "good," most likely because that's where the thoughts are going.

Dare to be the person who chooses to see the other side of the "bad," aka the "good," because if bad is present, so is good, and vice versa. And it's not amoral or lazy to look at the other side of the "bad." That's perhaps what was meant by the saying "turn the other cheek." Maybe it wasn't a slap in the face, but just turning your head to look at something from a different angle/perspective/point of view.

In or Out

Maybe standing out is the new fitting in.

Believe

"A belief is a thought you keep thinking." -- Abraham, Abraham-Hicks Publications


and thinking and thinking and thinking. So as long as we stay on the pathways of all the thoughts we've always thought, we will most likely keep creating the life we've always had. Which means if we want to change our belief systems, we need to start thinking different thoughts, and we need to think them more than all the other thoughts we have spent our entire life building, cultivating, proving, re-inforcing.

Think about it.

Hope

Hope leaves room for the possibility of it not happening. It's like Plan B - if you think you need a plan b, there is some aspect of you that doubts your conviction or the possibility of plan A. If we hope, we are still not 100% sure of the outcome.

Hope shines a light on the parts of ourselves that doubt. And the knowing of those doubts provide us with inspiration as we strengthen our conviction, bringing us closer to believing in the reality of that which we formerly hoped for.

I hope this was clear...

Still today

I was still today
Because there's no tomorrow
All we have is now

Gremlins

Around 4pm today, I got gremlins in my email and everything went into bulk mail. Why? No one knows. Not even tech support. And "gremlins" was their word, so yes, it actually is a technical term...

Effort and Effortlessness - Pt 4

Habitual Efforting

Letting of the need to effort in order to feel like we are doing something productive, to justify our right to exist, to make us more lovable, to appease our guilt, may be the hardest part for many of us. Are we willing to let go of working so hard? This is why in YS 2:47, Patanjali says to "let go of effort and focus on the infinite."  Contemplating the infinite while practicing effortlessness. It takes our dualistic, efforting brain, the thing in our Self that is designed to find problems and solve them, and gives it somewhere else to go – a place where time is not the issue, where duality is not a constant state of struggle, but where we can feel the space between the 2 sides and through that space, find the balance and effortlessness that we seek. By focusing on the space, the infinite, we start to grow our awareness of the infinite space within each of us. The big S self. The divinity within.

Again, the habits of logical thinking, measuring, comparing and judging may be a few of the obstacles we face in achieving a state of effortlessness. From there we can look at our willingness, or lack thereof, to accept the fact that it’s OK to not feel effort in a pose – especially if it’s a pose we’ve done a million times – like down dog. At some point, we master it and it’s effortless. So why make it harder than it needs to be? That’s where the physical pose is easy, but the need to make it harder – that is where efforting may show up, not as a tool to help grow ourselves, but as a habit. A habit that is just as unconscious  as eating that second piece of cake, procrastinating, snapping at a loved one, feeling victimized. When we take a look at the "work" we are doing, what is at the root of doing that work? Is it to bring yourself more in alignment with your big S self or your little s self? Observing our addiction to “working it out” may shed some light on why we aren’t getting what we want out of life.

This is one reason we want to achieve a state of Sthira, steadiness in our physical poses, which translate into our physical life. When the physical part is steady and effortless, when we become "good" at something, then we can start to refine. In the case of asana practice, when the body is steady, we start to refine the mine. Watching the mind's attachment or habits, including the voice inside you that keeps saying "you're not perfect enough. work harder. you can do better. you're not enough. you suck." Then we do what it says. We overactive our hands in down dog, we add in unnecessary tension in poses or aspects of our life that have become easy. Part of the reward of getting good at something is that it becomes more effortless. That's why we want to get good at something in the first place. The promise of effortlessness is the payoff for our hard work - the effort needed when we are learning something new. Ironic isn't it?

So when we achieve that state of physical effortlessness, celebrate and enjoy! This is where if you are focusing on the infinite, you can enjoy the state of being guilt free. If a state of effortlessness sends you into a tailspin, then the "work" becomes on examining the mind. If it's telling you that you need to work harder because you're not good enough, it's trying to get you to go back and examine the physical. It's creating a distraction to keep you from looking at it, so that aspect of your mind doesn't have to change. For that aspect of your mind, it's achieved a state of effortlessness and it wants to stay there. It's learned how to beat you up, it's good at it's job, and it wants to keep on cruisin'. It feels threatened when you shine a light in there.

I digress here - the cool part of all that is that the aspect of your mind that beat you up, got good at it's job, etc... is the part of you that helped get you to where you are now. The part of you that got you to the place where you are even contemplating things like "effortlessness." That's so rad.

Are we attached to efforting? Are we willing to let go of "trying" so hard, working so hard, beating ourselves up for "not doing enough?" Until we can embrace the concept that life doesn't have to be hard, painful, miserable, fruitless, etc... letting go of effort will probably be extremely challenging, but hey, then it's legal right? If i'm working hard to be effortless, then it must be ok...

Haiku #4

i fell off a chair
trying to reach something high
and then it folded

Effort and Effortlessness - Pt 3

Relaxing effort does not necessarily mean “become a rag doll,” whether it be in your yoga poses or in your life, even though for some, it may take an image that extreme to induce any relaxation at all, and believe me, even though they may feel like a rag doll, most people I see don’t look anything like said doll.

Relaxing effort might be in the form of not trying so hard, not worrying about getting the pose “right,” or trying to impress oneself, classmates, or teacher with how hard you are working, lest we should walk by and “catch” them daydreaming at their desk. Oh yeah, that was school. But don’t many of us have those same fears and habits as adults?

Patanjali tells us to relax effort. While doing a pose, there is usually one side that is working – contracting – while the other side is relaxing – stretching.  Let’s look at Parsvakonasana – side angle pose:

    The Mind of the Second Side

In side angle, pose, we are stretching on of the sides of the body. We are instructed to breathe into that side,  to open the ribs, lengthen the waist, rotate the chest to the ceiling. That would be the side of focus, the “working” side. But what about the other side? What if instead of fighting our way into increasing the twist and stretch from the top, we softened the bottom half of the back to may room for the top side to float into it’s place. What if instead of stabilizing by trying to keep the second side just as long as the first, we soften that side, creating a space for the top side to go without having to push something out of the way?

By focusing on the second side, we can increase a feeling of effortlessness by releasing tension on the second side, allowing the action of the first side to be more effortless, instead of adding unnecessary muscular tone/tension/activity to the second side, thus creating the need for more force by the first side in order to go deeper in the pose.

What gets me is that there is so much talk about bringing tone, and in my opinion unnecessary tension, to the “relaxing” side. Do we really need more tension on one side in order to relax on the other side? In some schools, they say yes, in fact you do. That if one side is contracting, the other must be stretching. While this may be in fact what is happening, I'm not sure that information is being used effectively in most cases. 

Is it fruitful to pull the body forward in a forward bend? On one hand, we are supposedly getting more stretch on the hamstrings. But what is happening in the neck, shoulders, back? In order to get more hamstring stretch, do we need to create upper body tension? Can't we have stretched hamstrings with a relaxed upper body as well? And if every time we do a forward bend with a tense upper body, aren't we in fact telling our body that in order to have bendy hamstrings we need  to work the upper body?

And the big question is, is having bendier hamstrings worth the extra cost in tighter shoulders? Hmmm.

The idea is to get these sides to be balanced in their effort, to be the same, so there is no difference between working and relaxing.  It is in gradually bring these 2 sides together in a balanced manner that YS 2:48 comes into play. When we achieve effortlessness on both sides and there is no longer the pull of the duality between working and stretching sides, “pairs of opposites cease to have impact” and from where I sit, in that Infinite non-dual moment, the pairs of opposites cease to exist. In that moment, we feel like we could stay there forever – it is that steady, comfortable, effortless, infinite, Whole. Yummy. It feels good to have it all. To be it all.

Next topic: Attachment to Effort

Haiku #4

Yoga is one way
Many paths make many roads
First we learn to drive

Haiku #3

Haikus work for me
Short and sweet and to the point
Even if they're round

Haiku #2

Once you've tasted it
You will want it every day
Inner voice of truth

Haiku #1

Finger talks to brain
Tiny cactus startles me
Drop of blood appears

Effort and Effortlessness - Pt 2

So how do we practice Sthiram Sukham Asanam?

YS 2:47 and the Mind of the Second Side

Thanks to Patanjali, he tells us in Yoga Sutra 2:47 – “Through relaxation of effort and meditation on the infinite.” Now that’s what I’m talking about, and what inspired me to do a few part series on Effort and Effortlessness.

“Relaxation in the midst of effort is a means, but it is also an end, that of dissolving all tensions.” 

---From Yoga: The First Steps, translated by Dr. Albert Franklin (my first yoga teacher. Thank you Bert, for this book and for teaching me what yoga asana practice is all about.)

So we get steady and comfortable by relaxing effort. How do we do that, “relax effort” and still do a physical practice, or even get the bills paid for that  matter?  We begin by approaching our practice consciously and eliminating extraneous effort and tension. In other words “work smarter, not harder.” Professional athletes use the least amount of effort possible to get the job done. That doesn’t mean they aren’t getting the job done. It means that they have refined their technique, focused their mind and cut out what doesn’t support the job at hand. Their choices are such that they do what it takes to get around the obstacle without taking a few extraneous laps around the field.

In yoga asana class, how many “laps around the field” are we taking in each pose? Just yesterday, I was breaking down bhujangasana (cobra pose) for the class. “Pull the chest forward, activate the triceps…” I said “if you’re not feeling you’re triceps (upper arm muscles) that’s not what we’re doing right now.” Some said that they were feeling it in the forearm. I thought to myself, “interesting.” I asked them to relax their hands. Voila! Triceps in, forearms out. And the hands were just fine during the finished product. The students had been instructed so many time to “activate the hands” that their hands were over-activated, aka tense. They had fixated on an instruction that had at one point been useful to them, and that same instruction, once mastered, was now an obstruction since now when they activated their already active hands, they were adding tension to an area that no longer needed extra a-tension (attention).

This is what I would call a mild case of “habitual efforting” in that by running the “activate the hands” instruction, they were subconsciously looking for the same feeling they had the first time they got that “aha” moment with active hands. Over time, the instruction was assimilated, and now the hands are naturally active, alive, aware. Looking for that same feeling adds tension. We see the same thing in downward facing dog. Over time the poses ceases to be a hamstring stretch and becomes a spinal extension. I see students try to get that deep hamstring opening satisfaction from a pose that will no longer give it to them without adding tension or other distortions. I say let yourself master the pose, have a moment of physical effortlessness and apply the “effort” to watching your mind during the duration of the pose.

But if I relax my effort, how will I get anything done?

Stay tuned…

Wow!

Now I can blog on the go with this new mobile blog app. No more excuses. It's time to seize those momentary quips of genius and post them for the world to see. Well, they'll be there, world seeing or not.

Peace on earth starts at home.

Effort and Effortlessness

YS 2:46

As a yoga teacher, I have over-arching themes and concepts for my students to explore. This year “effortlessness” has been the theme. So let’s begin the beguine again, and if we are starting from a yoga point of view, where better to turn than to the master of Yoga himself – Patanjali.

From Patanjali’s  yoga sutras, three of them talk about asana – the poses – the meat (or should I say “veet” for the vegetarians) of what comprises modern day yoga in the West. YS 2:46, 2:47, and 2:48.

2:46 – Sthiram Sukham Asanam.  Steady, comfortable poses.  Many have written about this sutra, myself included. But this sutra is so rich, we can (and do) keep coming back for more. 

Sthiram Sukham Asanam.  Steady, comfortable poses.  According to Patanjali – that is what we strive for in our asana practice. Seems simple enough. Hold the pose, don’t move, be comfortable. Right... Most of us who have tried this have found that it is not as easy as it seems. Something has got to go in that equation whether it be the steadiness, the ease/comfort of the pose, or the pose itself. My dog, Winston, is a master of this sutra. He can stay in one position for a loooooooooong time without effort and without moving. The ultimate "down dog" pose is my dog stretched out in a half-sleep state. His eyes are open, yet his body is totally relaxed. It’s as if he could stay there forever. And he does. Until the next thing comes along or I think he is so cute I have to pet him, pick him up and hold him. Is there a position or state that we can hold and feel so comfortable and steady that we find no reason to get up? I mean, even watching TV – at some point aren’t we moved to get up off the couch if only to walk to the kitchen to make a snack?

So how do we practice Sthiram Sukham Asanam? Tune in tomorrow. It will be interesting to see what comes next. If anything...

steady?

comfortable?

hungry?

Accounting

Accountability. We may resist it. We may love it. But it can give us the incentive to continue, to do better, to do our best, or at least to do when inertia sets in and that spark that got us going doesn't burn as hot.

I'm goal oriented. Yes I am. I write songs to be sung in public. I like to start and complete projects. I like a clean start and a clean finish. So when I'm doing "art for art's sake" in the form of a blog which maybe nobody is reading, or to write a song that nobody will hear because I don't have any gigs lined up, then those things that I love to do get put on the bottom of the pile. I may love to do them, but maybe I like the feeling of completion, of performance, of sharing the journey better than typing away at my computer, digging on my ruminations. Ruminating solo is fine, but I'm much more into conversations, even though they may be silent. Can a standup comedian be a standup comedian in one's bedroom with the door closed? (don't go there...) If I joke is told but no one hears it, is it a joke?

Accountability. I think it has to do with doing things that count. Or counting the things we do. And having someone outside of ourselves care whether we do it or not. Unless we are happy to count alone. Who can we count on? Who do we count in?

I'm happy when I'm "held accountable." I feel like I'm not all alone out there, counting grains of sand in a spoon and that there is more to it all other than the little "s" me. (self vs Self).

So this is another picking my blog up and dusting it off moment this year. But who's counting?

Time and Space

Time and space. Space and time. They exist only in duality. For physical malaise, rest is one of the biggest ways we can heal. We give ourselves the space for healing. Emotional rest might be called "time." They say "time heals all" and when they (whoever they are) said that, I'm assuming the subtext was "time heals all emotional and mental wounds and impressions." In that way, time might be called emotional "rest." Both rest and time have space. So we create more space, we create a opportunity for more healing on all levels.

Who doesn't want more space? Who couldn't use more space? If God is in the space, who wouldn't want more Divinity in one's life? I'm always open for a Divine Intervention. Anytime the Whole has a better idea than me (the little "s" self), I'm open to hearing it. Or am I? How can I be open to hearing it if I haven't given myself space and time to listen?

The answers we seek are closer than right in front of us. They are in us. They are us.

Trust

8-9-2011

Trust

So I just wrote this whole blog about trust directly into Blogger and I go to publish it, and lo and behold – the server is down and I lost the blog I spent so much time perfecting! I trust that no one was supposed to see that version. 

Symmetry/Asymmetry

"Find the symmetry in your asymmetry." I said that the other day while teaching a yoga class to a budding young group of teacher trainees. What did I mean by that? Let’s start by defining some terms.

A-sym-me-try n 1. the condition of being asymmetrical in an arrangement. 2. a relation between 2 things where the first has a relation to the second, but the second cannot have the same relation to the first.

Wow. Look at definition #2. That’s life. Life is asymmetrical. Life is messy. Even the most symmetrical lives still have the unknown factor bubbling beneath the surface. In art, asymmetry is movement. It’s exciting. Our eye moves about the page. It’s dynamic. The relationship is ever-changing. In our bodies, it’s our organs, our right/left, even though we think of them as symmetrical, they never will be given the fact that our innards are totally asymmetrical. Asymmetry in unpredictable. Asymmetry keeps us safe. It’s easier to attack the predicted. It’s easier for a burglar, to burgle a person that has a predictable routine, And yet, asymmetry sometimes gets a bad rap. We are naturally uncomfortable with change, with things that are out of balance. We move towards symmetry. We move towards inertia.

Sym-me-try n 1. the property of being the same or corresponding on both side of a central dividing line 2. harmony or beaut of form that results from balance proportions 3. the mathematical definition 4. a state of invariance shown by some phenomena when changes of orientation, charge, or parity are made

Nice. Seriously. Symmetry in tranquil, calm, predictable. In art, it’s a state of balance. Symmetry – a state of balance. In art, when we look at a symmetrical work, our eye settles on the page. It doesn’t move around. Symmetry is stasis. It is essentially inert. It doesn’t move or move us. It’s staying power.

In the body, we strive for symmetry based on the fact that we have a right and left. But we also have and top and a bottom, and a back and a front. Our internal organs aren’t symmetrical. And yet, we focus on symmetry in what is essentially an asymmetrical organism. No problem.

In the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali – the result of yoga is “pairs of opposites cease to have impact.” Basically a symmetrical state. If the “opposites,” aka right and left, are the same, they are no longer opposites. So in yoga we strive for state of sameness. Definition 4 of symmetry says essentially the same thing. In yoga, when we have achieved a state of yoga, we are no longer impacted by asymmetry. We remain neutral, calm, content, in the face of change, and change happens. Constantly. Even while standing in tadasana, mountain pose, where you are just standing there, basking in all your symmetrical glory.

So finding symmetry in your asymmetry is to relish the change, to be able to flow with the change, yet remain flexibly unchanged. To live in the eye of the hurricane, watching the excitement orbiting around you, but to tap into that which remains essentially unchanged – our Essence, Our big S self. That place inside that knows no sorrow, that feels no judgment. That place where we rest in our Svarupa – our true nature. It is beyond the asymmetry of the personality, beyond the you/me, good/bad, right/wrong-ness of it all. Where we are a human, being. Not a human, doing.

Asteya - non-stealing

One of the yamas is "asteya" which translates as non-stealing. What does that mean exactly? Well, there is the obvious - "thou shalt not steal." Don't take what doesn't belong to you. Ok. Simple enough. Or not.

What belongs to any of us? Do we ever actually "own" anything? If not, does that mean my casa truly is your casa so we should all make each other keys? I guess then we wouldn't actually need keys. because what would be the point? 

And what of this thing called stealing of ideas? We have copyright law, patents, and just plain ego that needs to take credit for our "original" thoughts and ideas. So is the person who makes it to the copyright office first, the one who gets to claim credit, ownership for the idea that I'm sure more than one person has had. You know what I'm talking about. We have all had a brilliant idea at one point in time, and then a few months, or a few years later, that very idea is on the market. Just because we didn't act on it, doesn't mean we didn't have it, but then we have to pretend that we never had the idea otherwise it seems like we are copying someone else's idea when it was the very idea we once had? I understand the need to cling to our desire to maintain that which sets us apart from the pack. It makes us special and feel good about ourselves, but really, don't all great ideas come from the primordial pool of consciousness anyway? 

And what about hearts? "He/she stole my heart." Really? Didn't we actually give it away? Did someone hold a gun to our head and make us invest all of our energy and attachment in something outside of ourselves? Yet, when the inevitable happens, and that something outside of ourselves eventually lets us down, we feel robbed. Robbed of what? Robbed of the time and energy we invested into that which we thought would bring us eternal happiness and gratification. But remember, we actually gave our hearts. There was no gun involved, right? And when I look back at my past, all the times my heart was "stolen," I see now that the "robber" didn't actually want my heart anyway. I actually forced it on them, so not only did I steal from myself, but also from the other person by throwing all this unrealistic expectation and/or responsibility on them. Of course, they could have walked away and said no, but that's a whole other discourse.

We could go on and on and list how we steal from one another, but from where I sit, that is just a distraction to keep us from looking at the bigger aspect of stealing. The only person we can steal is, is from our self. We steal time from ourselves. We put off doing what we know is important for what society wants us to believe is important. Isn't the only thing that is of any real importance is for us to figure out who we really are, and once we have figured it out, start doing what it takes to live from that place 24/7? So, yes, when I steal time and energy away from my path to my own Self realization, I am stealing. 

Asteya - non-stealing. Don't steal from that which helps create a conscious relationship between our little"s" self and our big "S" self. And you can't use that phrase. I thought of it first...

And the time I might spend worrying about that, well, that is the real stealing by stealing time and energy away from my Self.

:-)

Back to Blog

I took a break from blogging. Why? Because. That should be enough of a reason.

Back Home

Back home. No lizards to write about. No agaves. Just back in the real world digging through a stack of stuff. Stacks of stuff. Stuff sacks.

Moving on and forward.

Final Exam

Today they take the final exam. So what does this mean? There will be no more exams? Ever? Wow. Give me that final. Or not. Cuz then it would all be over. And life is good.

Every moment is a final exam of sorts. It's literally a "test" to see how we will decide in the moment. Will our past be the decider? Will our ego/identity? Will our soul? And how are we doing on the test? We give ourselves the grade. We give ourselves the choices we make, and therefore the life we are leading. So if you like your life, you are passing. If not, you might want to study some more.

Tapas - it's a main course

Our life is Tapas. Tapas, all day, everyday.  If we choose to live like that. And though it may seem extreme or impractical to have a daily diet of tapas (pun intended), I say “serve it up!” It’s coming anyway, so we might as well make the most of it.  And that is to have our life be our tapas. Our “austerity.” Our “heat.” Our practice. 

the NOW

It is beyond beautiful today. Right now. Now. The weather can shift in a instant, so I can stay inside and type, or I can go NOW and enjoy something that I often take for granted. NOW to enjoy that which will never be the same again. This NOW is already a new NOW and the weather is already shifting.

And so I am.

YMONA

YMONA - Yours, Mine, Ours, None of the above, All of the above

Artists are expected to have influences on their work. People constantly ask me as a musician, “Who do you sound like? Who are your influences?” basically, who do you want to be?  It’s been hard to answer those questions. Do I go back to what music I listened to on the radio growing up? Do I go back to what was played in our house that I didn’t necessarily choose to listen to, but was expose to anyway? Some of the jazz greats and American Idol top 12 say that they owe everything to their parents who exposed them to (fill in the blank) style of music, whether it be gospel, jazz, whatever.  So when do we stop imitating and start being ourselves? When have we assimilated those influences and even though I loved and still love Ella Fitzgerald, and learned every nuance, every riff, every breath of her singing, when am I not just an Ella imitator?  And then there is the question of plagiarism. When am I honoring Ella and when am I ripping her off?

It’s a fine line and at some point, apparently it needs to be drawn. I’m not sure how. I just know that I want to sit on this for awhile. 

Parts is Parts

“Only the adult blocks free expression by separating the parts from the whole. The child says “I run,” “I jump,” “I sing,” not “I am toeing out,” “my shoulders are back,” “I walk on the balls of my feet," until the adult has split his attention, making details the focus.” 

--- Mabel Ellsworth Todd, The Thinking Body, pg 281

Ok, the alignment thing never ends with me. Maybe it's because I'm teaching alignment right now, so it's quite in the forefront of my mind. Today yoga asanas seem to have become a series of 3-5 cues about where the feet, pelvis, arms, and focus go. So students learn the poses as a series of cues, instead of having their initial experience of the pose be from the essence, or energetic of the pose. The whole of the pose. The Whole. Trikonsansa. What are you? When I ask my students "who are you in this pose? What are you saying in this pose? What is the "personality" of this pose?" it's almost as if they have no idea what I'm talking about. Especially when they keep asking me where their hips go or what they are "supposed" to look like. Sometime I think to myself "who cares - how does it feel?" "How does this pose relate to you? to your life?" And sometimes I say it. Out loud. In class. Without apology. 

So doesn't it seem that this approach is taking us away from the Whole? And isn't yoga about union - self with Self - aka the Whole. So we have dissected into parts the very vehicle (yoga asanas) that was supposed to bring us to wholeness in the first place? 

Hmmmmmmm.

There. I said it. Out loud. In a blog. Without apology.

You may wish I'd just shut up already. But I won't. Without apology. But with love.

Crabs

I walked out of my room this morning and what did I find? A baby crab turned upside down on my doormat! It fit perfectly in the palm of my hand. I'm thinking, can it possibly be alive? How did it get here? It's really far from the ocean especially if your legs are 1.5 inches long. What should I do with it?

Well, first I went back inside and put on some clothes that would be appropriate to walk down to the beach in. Then, i took my toothbrush out the hotel glass that i've been using as a toothbrush holder, rinsed it out, and put the baby crab in it. I showed it to the resident healer. I asked if I should take it down to the sea. She said yes.

So I did.

I put it in the ocean and it was swept away. Did the crab come back to life? Get eaten by a shark? None of the above? Who knows. I did what I thought was the best thing at the time, and let the Divine take care of the rest.

Voices Inside My Head

Voices Inside My Head

I actually choreographed a dance for myself with this title. It was solo, no music. Very radical back then…  Little did I know that this theme would be a recurring one in my life. Ok, well, I did kinda know that I was on to something…

Those of you who know me and/or the classes I teach, know that it’s all about off the mat. You know that I could care less whether you ever get into the splits or get your legs behind your head.  Not to say that I don’t give ample opportunity or instruction to help get you there if those are your goals. But for me, the real juice of teaching is what happens outside of class.

I was trying to quantify what it is I bring to the table as a yoga teacher. What makes what I’m teaching different. As teachers, we ask ourselves these questions. First of all, it helps when a potentially new student wants to know what your class is like. And it’s critical as we brand and market ourselves, which based on the fact that yoga has fallen into the “Health and Fitness” model, we have to do that.

So I asked my students. They said, “Even though I feel amazing after your classes, and so and so’s  classes, when I’m out there in the world, having some trouble, it’s your voice that I hear in my head. You help me off the mat.”

To be clear – it’s not “me” – it’s the primordial pool of teachers that stand with and behind me, that come through me when I’m teaching. But that makes total sense. I don’t shy away from using gross and radical imagery or examples in my classes. You know why? People remember them. And do you know why else? People see that they are just like me and as Dennis Adams taught me “if I can do it, you can do it.” I like to close the gap between student and teacher and acknowledge that we couldn’t exist without each other, that they are teaching me as much as I am teaching them. Period. So if it’s my voice in your head that I hear, and it’s helping, YAY! If it’s someone else’s and it’s helping, YAY!  Even if I can help inspire you to want to know yourself, who you really are, then I’ve done my job. Whatever voice you hear in your head that’s helping is great. My goal is that it leads you to your inner voice of truth, so it’s your voice inside your head that’s helping.

And as Edith Ann would say, “and that’s the truth. (big raspberry followed by sheepish grin).

Hari Om Tat Sat

More on Fruit

Surrendering the fruits of our actions –

What does that mean exactly? I bust my behind at a 50 hrs a week job I don’t even like and then I have to give up my entire paycheck? I don’t think so. Although, I think it might be even more difficult than that.

From where I sit, the Divine doesn’t want money. It doesn’t want anything. Except to watch Itself (and that would be us) grow and evolve. So where does this “giving up the fruits of our actions” fit in? There must have been a reason, since we find that concept crossing over into almost all religious dogmas (dogmi?).  I think it all boils down to “don’t take it personally.” Yes, that is one of the 12 Dennis-isms of Dennis Adams, Master Healer, who I studied with and practiced under for many many years, and when I say practiced, I mean really applied the teachings, such as “don’t take it personally.”  One aspect of that is obvious. Someone calls you a name or does something mean, don’t take it personally, cuz it’s never about you. It’s always about them. And yes, this works in reverse as well (when I do something mean, it’s never about them, it’s about me.)

So I dug deeper. What about taking success personally? What about thinking that I, the great and powerful Oz, is the secret of my success? That I, single handedly pulled myself out of the projects and into the house on the hill. That I taught the best yoga class ever, and that my students are the most conscious and enlightened of them all.  Those would be the very fruits of my actions that I am asked to give up. To not take credit for my success. To hand it over and give the credit back to that Higher Power, Steve Winwood’s Higher Love. My Higher Self. The Divine.

How do I do that? I don’t let my ego get all caught up in what I’m doing. I don’t base my identity on my accomplishments and failures. I allow myself to be a conduit for the Divine, accessing more of my “Dhi” aka inner Knowing, the part of the brain that makes decisions based more on our Sva Dharma (soul’s purpose) than on gratifying my senses and validating my ego. I’m not saying don’t enjoy the wonderful, delicious things that life on Earth has to offer. I’m saying that it’s about surrendering the ego for something larger. A better investment for my fruits. Investing said fruits in something greater than my ego fulfillment. Investing my fruits into my Self Awareness, evolving my Consciousness, and in order to do that, I stop taking credit for my success and give it to the One who made me in it’s image in the first place, so with that logic I’m basicially surrendering my fruits and investing them in Me instead of me.

And I’m all for a good investment. And I like fruit.  It’s a perfect storm. It’s a perfect day. It’s perfect. 

Juicy and Sustainable

Earth shattering class today. One participant said it would “change my practice forever.” Wow. I’m honored to have been there for that.

The juiciness and richness that comes from tasting your food. From tasting your practice. For becoming a connoisseur of yoga. Moving from yoga fast food to yoga fine dining. I can really get behind being that kind of chef. “Serving up yoga, one breath at a time.”

When I first started doing yoga (decades ago), it wasn’t about how many poses I could cram into an hour long session. It was about how many breaths I could remain still in a posture. I remember getting all excited when it was something like “I held Trikonasana for 10 breaths 6 counts in, 6 counts out.”

The numbers may not be exact, but you get the idea. It was about how long I could sustain inhale and exhale, and then how long I could sustain that pattern in an asana. I guess I was all about a sustainable practice! And if you think about it, isn’t part of the essence of yoga having a sustainable practice?

Back in the olden days, the really olden days, say 10,000 or so years ago, it was about how long you could stay alive in order to be able to keep doing your yoga practice to give you more time to get enlightened.  Now it seems like the life of a yogi is as long as they can sustain a rigorous practice until the body starts to break down. Reminds me of my dancer days. Dancers have a limited professional lifespan. At some point the body says, “I’m not into playing this way anymore.” There are exceptions – Martha Graham and Merce Cunningham were performing well into their 60s, 70s. And quite frankly, it showed. I had the honor of seeing Merce perform at that age, and it looked like he was in pain. Same with Martha.

Are we approaching our yoga practice as something that we can sustain over the long haul? I’m not saying not to do extreme postures. I’m saying that it’s how you do them. Dharma Mittra does the most wack poses, and he’s 70! But his attitude is humbling. He surrenders each pose he does “for the Lord.” I’m not talking Jesus Christ here, but for the Lord of Life. (Lord is a loaded word, but I wanted to quote him exactly). You can fill in your picture of “Lord” with whatever you want. Whatever you revere. Whatever it is that gave you your essence,  your life as your essential You.  He surrenders everything he does. Patanjali would call it “offering up the fruits of your practice.”

How many of us are offering up the fruits of our practice to something other than a flat abdomen, really cut arms, or the ability to do poses that no one else can do, all of which sets us apart from the pack, making us essentially “greater than,” “more desirable,” or from a teacher’s point of view, “more popular” which translates as “I’m a really good yoga teacher. “

I also fell into that trap. For a while. And I enjoyed it. It only became a trap when I kept on insisting that I practice that way, when every fiber of my being was begging me to stop and re-connect with what yoga really meant to me. To reconnect with why I did it in the first place. And that reason was all about laghavam – lightness. I wanted to feel light, be light, turn to light. I was no longer feeling light. I was feeling hurt, tight, competitive, and easily excitable. I was not able to sustain that kind of practice.

Then I took a class from Rod Stryker at a Yoga Journal conference a few years ago. The theme was sthirah and sukha. (YS 2:46 Sthirah sukham asanam). I remembered my roots. I remembered my stillness. I remembered the beauty of the long, steady hold. I remembered what the heck I was doing there in the first place!

That practice changed my practice. Forever. I remembered. 

So, in order to sustain our practice, we must find something there that is lasting, rewarding, that doesn’t fade with age. It’s not about the poses. It’s not about restorative vs power yoga. It’s about finding what is the real juice, the real flavor of the practice that sustains us. It’s about finding that which can provide us with nutrients in a way that inspires us to be able to bite into life and let the juiciness of it all run down our face. To delight in each bite, whether bitter or sweet.

Thank you all who have taught me, and those who continue to teach me, and remind me to sit down when I’m eating, and to chew my food slowly enough to taste and digest it. 

Silence

Today we are not talking. And not eating. Enjoying the juice we drink as well as the juice that is within.

A Blue Bird and a Cactus

So here is my moment of inspiration:

How can a blue bird sit on top of a cactus? Lightness.

Non-judgment. Sensation vs Pain. Will that bird ever truly suffer? If it could, it would mean that the bird would have to have an opinion, a judgment regarding the source of the pain. It goes back to the Buddha example: 1 arrow, 10,000 arrows. The Buddha gets hit with an arrow. He feels sensation. The sensation goes away. That’s it. We get hit with an arrow, we get sensation, then we start getting angry or scared about what happened, Pain sets in. Then we get more angry – at them for shooting it and hitting me, and at myself for getting in the arrow’s way. “(“if only I would have gone to the store instead of I wouldn’t be here, hit by this arrow, which will probably  leave a scar, or worse, damage my precious hamstring muscle,  which means my forward bends will really suck and every time I bend forward to touch my toes I’ll be reminded of the ignoramus who shot me with an arrow”).

Sigh.

If the Buddha has no pain, just sensation, then wouldn’t the bird? Unless birds can judge. Unless birds have the capacity to blame. Unless birds are as smart as we are. Then all bets are off. Which leads me to the original question:  How can a blue bird sit on top of a cactus?

Lightness.

INSPIRATION/EXPIRATION

The difference between inspiration and expiration. When we have a moment of inspiration, it’s well, inspiring to say the least. And it’s in the moment. Right here right now. And that is the moment to act.

I know there are many songs, ideas, poems, profound thoughts, patent-able ideas that I have had, and many have suffered the backside of inspiration not acted upon. Expiration. Yes, the moment passed and even though I swore “I know I’ll definitely remember it this time because this idea/song/poem/thought is soooooooo good, how can I forget it?" And just like the other moments of inspiration, they have gone to the grave, expired. Dust to dust. They have gone from my mind, and gone back to the dustbin of ideas, the collective unconscious. And then of course, at one point, someone else writes the book you wanted to write, the song you wanted to sing, the invention that you wanted to invent.

It’s all there for the taking, and when these moments of inspiration come, we might want to weigh the decision. Is it worth stopping for? I say yes. These moments, in my opinion, are far greater than I would have ever thought of. So, from where I sit (and I am actually sitting), these moments are portholes to the Divine. Literally, it’s that “higher Self” or in yoga terms, your “Dhi” trying to get your attention. If we stop and acknowledge these moments, we pave the way for the real meeting of the Divine. I mean, if you were Divine, aka God, Divine Mother, Allah or whatnot, wouldn’t you want to make sure that before you showed up in your fullness, the person you’d be showing up for was even paying attention?  


Again, many are called, few choose.  


Tomorrow, a moment of inspiration…

I stepped into an agave

Yes, I did. Yes I did. 

Last night as I was wrapping up the blog stuff, and T-shirt designing and went out into the dark night, I was uber-careful. It’s bright in the room, and outside there are no lights per se. Just some of those solar powered things along the path. Which means I need to make it across the pool deck without falling into the pool, and then get centered down the path. So I shuffle my way past the pool, feel my way down the stairs, and just when I think I’m home free, thinking that I was truly on the path - crunch, trip, yikes, blood. I walked into an innocent agave. Lucky for me, it wasn’t a cactus. I apologized to the agave and went home to tend the wound. Since it was really dark, as I’ve already established, hence the incident at all, I had no idea if there was blood gushing down my leg, cactus quills (at that point i wasn’t exactly sure what I had stepped into), a gash, welts, or nothing. A few scratches and some Dr. Bronner’s soap later, all  under control.

The moral of the story is - just because you think you are on the path, doesn’t mean you are. You have to actually BE on the path to make it count. 


:-)   this is a sheepish grin...

Epilogue - Alignment and Worldview

As most of us know, in Trikonasana, triangle pose with right foot front, we usually are feeling the inner thigh of the front leg, the left side body, or a combination of thereof as the main course, what I call “the parts that are talking (or sometimes screaming) the loudest. It’s the “what you’re supposed to be feeling” in the pose.  This is when the “one size fits all” generally works. Not on this particular day.

A few months ago, I was teaching “Ageless Yoga, “ a slower paced class for people who need more time to get into and out of the poses, mostly older baby boomers and people who injured themselves in another class. As usual, I was inviting them to explore different aspects of the pose – what was going to work for them given their own particular issues.

We lined ourselves up, did a few times dynamically to warm up for the hold, then we held it. I asked them to think about releasing the “second side of the back” to allow more depth in the pose and more freedom around the spine and side body. That normally increases action on the stretching side. When I asked them if they were feeling more in the side body, not one of them was feeling that as the point of focus! I went to inner thigh. What about there? Feeling more? No. Really???!!! Each person was feeling triangle in a completely different place ie – the quadriceps, the calf, the shin, the eyebrow, whatever. Their alignment was good, no danger there, and yet every experience was distinctly different from the next. I was astounded and let me tell you, I’m rarely astounded.

 I had made the assumption that they would be feeling pretty much the same thing, give or take a quad or hamstring, but when I checked in with them, every person was feeling something completely different (nothing dangerous btw), and all of them were feeling things I never even considered one could feel in that particular pose. What an eye opener! What I learned then and there is to never assume I know what someone else is feeling. (you’d think that after all the therapy I’ve had, I would have that one down by now!)  I had never walked their walk, and I didn’t have the perspective to know what being in a 60 or 70 year old body feels like.

So again, I see that  I am blessed. I have students who are willing to come to class and teach me. For that I am truly grateful.

What does that example have to do with alignment? Maybe nothing, maybe everything, but it helped me open my eyes and heart in a new way, thus changing my worldview. Now, with this new Self, I start the process of re-aligning myself with the Self that I just grew to be.

Namaste.

Part 4: Re-aligning Our Teaching

If “one size fits all,” show it to me.  

In this almost final part of this rant on the pitfalls of the current definition of “perfect alignment,” I turn to us, the teachers. Are the same perfect alignment cues given to Tom appropriate for Mary? If we say yes, then you haven’t looked at a cadaver.  If you said no, then I’m preaching to the choir. Then why are we so hell bent on rattling off the current set of alignment cues? Maybe there is something deeper going on…  In the name of proper alignment, are we exercising some sort of power and control over our students? And if so why? Unless we’re teaching children, everyone in the room is a capable adult who did just fine before they stepped into our classroom.

I’m going to pose one more set of questions for teachers to consider, some of which may seem obvious to some, blasphemous to others, offensive to many, idiotic to any.

1. Am I trying to control my student’s behavior in and maybe even outside of class? If so, why?
2. What makes me frustrated or uncomfortable as a teacher regarding my student’s behavior?
3. Am I still worried about “getting it right” as far as my practice and teaching goes?
4. How did I empower my students today?
5. Am I afraid they might know more than me? If so, how do I react, both internally and externally?

If we are going to ask our students to look at themselves and make changes whether it be to their lifestyle or to their alignment, hopefully we are willing and able to do the same, not only in our lives on the mat, off the mat, and in the classroom. 

In summary, I invite us all to acknowledge the here and now of our students, taking into consideration age, experience, part of the country, etc…  and to do our best to give them what they need, while still considering what they want.

And if, dear reader, you will indulge me, there is one more entry to come on what I’m now calling “The Alignment Chronic-cles.”  Until tomorrow...

Alignment as a Journey - Part 3 (of 4)

Many students look at alignment and how to get into the poses as a series of steps and rules. The beginner looks overwhelmed. More things to memorize? But when the list is memorized, have they really experienced the pose, or are they still in their heads? It can be disempowering to tell them every little nuance, every step of the way. When learning to write, we started with big crayons and block letters. We worked with them for until we were ready to move on to smaller crayons and pencils. Over time, our dexterity increased and in a few years, we were ready for cursive, and then maybe even calligraphy. It would have been ridiculous to have been asked to write in cursive in the beginning stages. Why demand calligraphy of our beginners? And do we all want them to write the same? Look the same? Do the pose the same?

As teachers, have we taken the time to explore other points of view regarding alignment, or are we also victims of the script of what we “should” be teaching? To be a responsible, non-biased teacher, we need to have at least experimented with or even considered that someone might not fit into the mold of what we call “proper alignment.” Alignment is not posture. Alignment is being aligned with who you are in the moment physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. Finding ease in that moment.  If someone is crying, do we tell them to sit up straight? No. We let them be where they are and then ask what we can do to help make them feel better. Referencing the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali – freedom is living in our Svarupa, our self knowledge. And Self awareness is ultimately taught from within the self.

Part 2: Discovering the New Alignment (part 2 of now 4 parts)

PART 2: DISCOVERING THE NEW ALIGNMENT 

(yesterday it was Part 1 of 3. Now it's Part 2 of 4. I'm re-aligning myself.)

I have seen the freedom and health through alignment trend evolve into over-stabilized, fearful, and resistant students (and teachers). What set us free, is now our jailer. We have aligned ourselves into a corner.

Bonnie Bainbridge Cohen said:

“alignment itself is not a goal. It is a continual dialogue between awareness and action.” 

What I see has having transpired, is that the dialogue part has been lost. It seems like the exploration and discovery aspect of the process of alignment has been replaced with a list of  “cues” and talking points. Sometimes it ever sounds like we are reciting scripts that had to be memorized in our 200 hr trainings. I’m not saying we shouldn’t keep an eye on the knee joint to make sure it’s not compromised, or that we shouldn’t address the issues of the lower back and neck. What I’m saying is that most people who come to class already have a basic sense of how to stand and place their bodies in a safe way. We are over-teaching. We are controlling. And one set of rules does not apply to each and every person out there.

Since it is rare that anyone has a home practice today, we need to include more of what a home practice can give us – which is getting to know our bodies, getting to know who we really are in there. 20 years ago, we didn’t have the option to take a yoga class everyday, so that our weekly class, our shot of inspiration from the teacher was an excellent way to shed some light and help guide us in our home practice. Now our student takes 5-7 yoga classes a week, with different teachers all telling them different things. Many are confused and not sure what is the “right” way to do the pose. The “right” way is the way that helps them achieve their goals, whether they be healing an injury, gaining strength or flexibility, or finding some peace in their day or life.

Why not empower our students through self-discovery? Why not stop assuming that our students know nothing about their bodies, and give them some freedom to explore different aspects of the poses so they can discover the appropriate version for themselves and their needs?  Maybe instead of telling them what they should be feeling, we could let them know what they shouldn’t be feeling (ie – strain in the low back, etc…). Most students are afraid of “getting it wrong,” so why not be the teacher that assumes they will get it right?

To be continued…

The Pitfalls of Perfect Alignment - Part 1 (of 3)

the rant goes on---

PART 1: STAYING IN LINE WITH THE TIMES

And thus we begin. We want to become a yoga teacher. We took the 200 Hr training, and now we have our first class. Fast-forward 5 years. We have many classes, have seen many different students. How have our classes evolved? Are your students happier, healthier (yes, more injury-free would apply here)? Do they love themselves more? Do they have more of what they want in life? Do they shine?

What about your class content? Has it evolved? Is it more inspiring? Does it still excite you?

What about you? Do you still love yoga? Are you happier, healthier? Do you love yourself more? Have you embraced your Sva Dharma (life’s purpose)? How’s your Sva Rupa (self knowledge)?

We change. We evolve. We start out as a bunch of cells and grow into these amazing things like human beings. Each of us different, unique. Yet we all share the same concept – nothing stays the same.  And if we resist change it results in stagnation. Stuckness. We all reach a point where the “same ol’ same ol’” just doesn’t cut it.

This concept also applies to our yoga practice. As we grow, evolve physically and consciously, our practice needs to grow with us. If it doesn’t, it may hold us back from becoming that which we desire, that very “which” that got us into yoga in the first place.

As yoga teachers, shouldn’t we apply the same thing to our teaching? Not only how we teach, but what we teach. If we look back, a very different student was coming to our classes 15-25 years ago. Nobody knew what a psoas muscle was, and terms like “down dog” had to do with obedience training of the beloved family mutt. Aerobics was hitting the scene, and people were just getting into their bodies as a collective nation. (Can you feel the burn?)

It was totally appropriate to focus and impress the importance of proper alignment, especially since many were coming to yoga as a way to heal their bodies. As yoga teachers, we started focusing on alignment as a way of life, instead of the energetic aspects and energetic alignment aspects of yoga. We were addressing the needs of our students. We wanted to help them heal, not add insult to injury.

It’s 20 years later, and most of the people coming to class have a high amount of body knowledge and anatomical awareness. We have students coming in and when they talk about their injuries they rattle off words like “brachialis” or  ”adductor” or any other muscle name or anatomical word that would best describe their ache. Granted, it’s nice to have a pop quiz every now and then, but it’s crazy!

Our students have grown. They are body-educated. They’ve taken Pilates, had physical therapy, and learned the names of their muscles. And yet our teaching remains the same. Have we grown as teachers? Have we kept up with our students and their new set of needs?

To be continued…

My mind is empty...

... my body is the vast expanse of the sky. This is a practice based on Yoga Sutra 2:47 - "the way to master asana is to relax effort and contemplate the Divine (or meditate on the Infinite, whatever melts your spiritual butter...)

All day I was having cool thoughts about what to blog. After a spectacular sunset beach walk, my mind is empty.

Oh yes, the Sri Tee Shirt Sutras:

Today's sutra:
Pull your head out of your asana

buy it now--  http://www.zazzle.com/pull_your_head_out_of_your_asana_tshirt-235702623383001787

go forth and prosper...

Lizard Posing - Lizard Posting

If you've been to a yoga class, you may have heard of lizard pose. We practiced it today as a matter of fact. If you've been to a rocky beach or river, you may have practiced lizard pose. Basking on warm rocks, invisible to the outside world, content in your own skin. Ahhhhhhhh!

We have a lizard in the yoga studio here at Prana del Mar. His name is Dusty. Because he looks dusty, as in blending in with the floor. At first we thought he was dead. But he is very much alive and moves a little bit everyday. Why did he find haven in the yoga studio? There are plenty of warm rocks, sunshine and bugs outside. But he is in our class now. And we love him.

But some are irked that he didn't have to pay for the training...

I think tomorrow I'll have Dusty lead the discussion on the chakras. It'll be interesting to get a reptile's point of view.

Extreme Yoga?

These days it seems like if you take enough yoga classes, you're going to get injured. What shocks the heck-fire out of me, is that most of us come to yoga to heal some aspect of ourselves. In Ayurveda, that which heals, can also poison if used in the wrong way, wrong amount. This is not to say that cardamom pods or cumin seeds are poisonous, but how they are used will either heal or hurt. 

Same with yoga.


Yoga and injury. I don’t believe that the two go together. When yoga is treated like an extreme sport, yes, it’s part of the package. But in the true yoga, the union of self with Self, there is no injury except to parts of ourselves that hide us from our light. This is not to say that there aren’t yoga practices that consciously break every part of their body so they can repair it, and in the repairing, eliminate the positve/negative charges of the cellular structure. That’s’ a different story. Why are there 70 year old yoga masters that can do the most twisted and crazy poses without blinking an eye? I think it’s because they took the slow road, the road of being true to the moment, being true to where the body/mind was in each moment, honoring the Divinity in that moment, thus, the practice was all about honoring the Divinity of the physical and non-physical. 


I was never injured from yoga until I started doing power flow. At first,  it felt great. I was doing really cool and extreme poses. After a few months I started to get injured – back problems, pulled hamstring, blah blah blah.  Why the injury? Part of it I attribute to group classes. When doing extreme poses in a group dynamic with a teacher ranting at the top of their lungs to go harder faster, there’s a tendency towards the competitive. We start competeing with the teacher, the others, ourselves. If I had been working one on one with a guru, I seriously doubt I would have started this pattern of injury because there would be no one but me to compare myself to, other than my guru, who would have been in an egoless state, giving me nothing to push against. The only thing that I would have injured was my ego. 


Now, the idea that you’re going to get injured in yoga is out there. It’s become a given. I have a problem with that. If yoga is supposed to make your life better, is it better with a pulled hamstring or strained wrists or tight shoulders? I guess if it’s really working, you could be physically beat up and still be smiling, but wouldn’t it be more fun to have both physical well-being as well as mental and emotional well-being?

What I really want to do

What I really want to do right now is go enjoy the sunset on the beach. The others are taking the exam, so it's time to enjoy some of the beauty and prana that nature has to offer.

This is me, still committed to blogging, and this is me, also committed to balance.

This is me, signing off. I'm opting for the bigger picture, the more expansive beauty.

:-)

Hope you choose to enjoy yourself tonight. It's the full moon in May, so pay attention to your dreams for extra fun.

Planet Earth - the Ultimate Reality Show

“My” body. Just the fact that we use the possessive case when talking about it indicates that we are not in fact, our bodies. The ownership of the body suggests impermanence.  It’s something we “have.”  The idea of Self – we don’t feel our Self as something we own when we think about our Self. And yes, we say things like my Self, or even my Soul.  But as soon as we give it a name or identity, it is no longer that which can't be named. By naming it (nama rupa) we have made it physical.  Our Self is something we can feel it, know it, in fact we are it. Our Self exists before words and thought constructs.

So why is making the leap that we are not our bodies so hard? I think it's because we really like them and are attached to them. How do we treat our possessions? Notice the thingswe really love. Do we use them? Protect them? Save them for later? Clean them? Trash them? These are exactly the things we do to our bodies, and until we can truly lose our fear of death – abinivesha – we are attached to the physical plane.

Maybe we don’t fear death, but we fear pain. If we fear pain, that is also an indicator that we are attached to the physical plane and the pull it has on us - on our samskaras. It indicates that we are still pulled by the contents of our mind, the tattwas (elements) and things that are physical. The attachment shows up not as something we “love” but as something we “fear” or “hate.”  As soon as we give our power over to it, we see we have attachment to something, as we have made it “real.” When we can see the whole thing from a neutral place, suffering will end. Knowing that we are eternal and much more than the play we cast ourselves in. Planet Earth is a reality show and we are all on it. Who is watching? We are. Who is watching us watch? That is the question.

Getting real

We are the ones who make things REAL. Things that are really really REALly important to us - that's what we consider "real":  My love for you is real. Get real. This realationship is really important to me. This thing/objective is really important to me. 


When things are less important - both positive and negative, (our negative story can be a really important part of our identity. it's chock full of pain, blame, and excuses that keep us from focussing on who we really are), they become less impactful and "real" to us. Out of sight, out of mind. Things that are important, we remember, things not so important, we forget. 


So we change what's real - what's important, and we change our reality.