Say what you mean? Mean what you say? For reals?
Easier said than done. That's kind of wack since in this case saying is doing.
Why don't we say what we mean? Probably because we often times don't even have a clue as to what we want to say. We just know we want to say or express something and instead of waiting, we blurt out whatever to whomever, whenever, in whatever format happens to be available: text, blog, facebook, email, voicemail, middle finger hand gesture.
I dont believe on sitting on unspoken words or stuffing feelings and all that. But I do believe in responding instead of reacting. So perhaps allow a "cooling off" period before we start slinging the blame, pointing the finger (middle or otherwise).
On the other hand, when it comes to saying Yes to things that speak to our heart, or complimenting someone, or appreciating something, we can get a bit stingy. That's when we "exercise discernment" and say things like "let me get back to you on that." Believe me, I get it.
One thing that I've been practicing for quite some time now, is saying yes to those things I know I really want to do. For example, if I know I want to go to a workshop, I sign up and pay my money. Even if it's months in advance. Yes, things may come up, but since I've been doing this practice, they really don't because I've made the space in my life for it to happen, and the Universe schedules the rest accordingly. It feels good to say yes to that type of thing.
And I pay attention when I feel like I want to be stingy with my praise or positive comments. Why would I hold back? Am I afraid that the person will be better than me or have more power over me? Ridiculous! When has complimenting someone ever hurt me? And how did that nasty rumor get out in the first place?
So say what you mean. Mean what you say. Tell the truth, but remember, in order to tell the truth, you need to find the truth, which may not be the "truth" in the moment of reaction, fear, or pain when our "survival" is at stake. It may take some time to find the words to express what we really want to say, but I know from experience, it is well worth it.
Easier said than done. That's kind of wack since in this case saying is doing.
Why don't we say what we mean? Probably because we often times don't even have a clue as to what we want to say. We just know we want to say or express something and instead of waiting, we blurt out whatever to whomever, whenever, in whatever format happens to be available: text, blog, facebook, email, voicemail, middle finger hand gesture.
I dont believe on sitting on unspoken words or stuffing feelings and all that. But I do believe in responding instead of reacting. So perhaps allow a "cooling off" period before we start slinging the blame, pointing the finger (middle or otherwise).
On the other hand, when it comes to saying Yes to things that speak to our heart, or complimenting someone, or appreciating something, we can get a bit stingy. That's when we "exercise discernment" and say things like "let me get back to you on that." Believe me, I get it.
One thing that I've been practicing for quite some time now, is saying yes to those things I know I really want to do. For example, if I know I want to go to a workshop, I sign up and pay my money. Even if it's months in advance. Yes, things may come up, but since I've been doing this practice, they really don't because I've made the space in my life for it to happen, and the Universe schedules the rest accordingly. It feels good to say yes to that type of thing.
And I pay attention when I feel like I want to be stingy with my praise or positive comments. Why would I hold back? Am I afraid that the person will be better than me or have more power over me? Ridiculous! When has complimenting someone ever hurt me? And how did that nasty rumor get out in the first place?
So say what you mean. Mean what you say. Tell the truth, but remember, in order to tell the truth, you need to find the truth, which may not be the "truth" in the moment of reaction, fear, or pain when our "survival" is at stake. It may take some time to find the words to express what we really want to say, but I know from experience, it is well worth it.
No comments:
Post a Comment