Creative or...

So if I think I'm a creative person, yet I don't actually create, am I still creative?

If a creativity happens and no one else experiences it, was is still creative, or just a pointless exercise in spending time? And then, could that creativity have been just as effectively experienced in the mind of the creator?

And if according to the belief that we are all made in the image if our Creator, then aren't we all creators creating anyway? And then what is so "special" about being creative?

Maybe the "specialness" of the creative person has nothing to do with creativity, but their ability to acknowledge the Oneness in all things, experiences, thoughts, ideas. Maybe creativity is nothing more than being a Creator, which is who we really are.

So in that case, am I still a creative person even if at the end of the day I have nothing to show for it? Or if my choices weren't to create, but to consume? Can we simultaneously be consumers and creators? And does this relate to "doers" and "be-ers?"

Humans doing vs humans being?

Or maybe I am just trying to figure out if I really like to play guitar, make art, write, etc... anymore, or maybe its me not allowing myself to choose what makes me happy and inspired, or me avoiding the possible pain not being acknowledged for what I've created. Or maybe it's inertia. Or laziness. Or something else.

Or maybe I genuinely don't care anymore. And is that such a bad thing? To not care whether or not I'm a creative person?

And what about this discourse? Creative? Indulgent? Procrastinating?

Or maybe it's time to hit the mat of life and stop taking it all so seriously.