Philip Seymour Hoffman died yesterday. Heroin OD. This morning on the radio, there was a dude, some addiction counselor to the stars type thing, talking about how he's an addict, sober for 23 years, and everyday is a day where he is tempted. Where he has to make a conscious choice not to use. He talked about some people who could just stop using heroin and have it never bother them again. He attributed it to the "addictive personality."
What makes one personality addictive and another not? Aren't we all addicted to something? Healthy living? Exercise? Vegetarianism? Self-righteousness? Gossip? Self-deprication? Chocolate? Breathing? Water? Wait Jean, we NEED air and water to LIVE!!!! Yes, I know. But that is also how the addict feels. But really, you can survive without heroin!!!! Apparently not in Philip Seymour Hoffman's case. And he couldn't survive with it either.
One thing that the addictive personality points out in all of us, is the idea of conscious choice. Conscious living. I know I'm not ready to give up my water and air addiction yet. Maybe never. And I'm OK with that. For now anyway. Because air and water still serve me. They still work for me. But I am ready to give up other things. Or at least I think I am. Like complaining. Like judging. Like really judging. Like really really judging. And then I say that, and BAM! there it is. The thing that I've been self-righteously judging all these years, and it's totally in my face. I see how I REALLY feel about it! Gak! Then I take a deep breath, taking it all in in that deep breath, and say Yes I was judging. AWESOME! Now I can stop. Because I know. And voila. I have more information to make a more conscious choice.
And drink more water. That's on the list. Drink lots more water. Not that i'm judging myself for not drinking or anything...
:-)
What makes one personality addictive and another not? Aren't we all addicted to something? Healthy living? Exercise? Vegetarianism? Self-righteousness? Gossip? Self-deprication? Chocolate? Breathing? Water? Wait Jean, we NEED air and water to LIVE!!!! Yes, I know. But that is also how the addict feels. But really, you can survive without heroin!!!! Apparently not in Philip Seymour Hoffman's case. And he couldn't survive with it either.
One thing that the addictive personality points out in all of us, is the idea of conscious choice. Conscious living. I know I'm not ready to give up my water and air addiction yet. Maybe never. And I'm OK with that. For now anyway. Because air and water still serve me. They still work for me. But I am ready to give up other things. Or at least I think I am. Like complaining. Like judging. Like really judging. Like really really judging. And then I say that, and BAM! there it is. The thing that I've been self-righteously judging all these years, and it's totally in my face. I see how I REALLY feel about it! Gak! Then I take a deep breath, taking it all in in that deep breath, and say Yes I was judging. AWESOME! Now I can stop. Because I know. And voila. I have more information to make a more conscious choice.
And drink more water. That's on the list. Drink lots more water. Not that i'm judging myself for not drinking or anything...
:-)
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